For those still keeping track of my illnesses some new things have reared their ugly heads and they are cold sweats, chills, high fever and the winner is... pissing blood! Yay!

What man doesn't long to see bright red urine shooting out of their dick and splattering into the white porcelain bowl of the toilet? I know it'd look great in a horror film! Okay, I told you earlier I was having a burning sensation when I urinated, so I thought maybe it was the medication I was taking, so it was recommended to me to consider that it might be UTI (urinary tract infection) and to try these dark brown tablets made from cranberries that make you pee bright red. I did and they do! I know what I'm bring you for Thanksgiving! So the pain went away, but the pee is very much Hammer Horror Red. In fact when I first whizzed and saw the bright color I actually exclaimed that it looked like Dario Argento was pissing in the toilet!

My personal nurse just checked my temperature rectally and it was 103 Dees Degrees, but I noticed even though she had it shoved up in me it wasn't a rectal thermometer. 

"Oh! You so right Meester Lentz! Now open wide!"

I tried to fight her off from pushing it into my mouth without sterilizing it, but the straps that held me down to the bed were too tight and she climbed up on top of me with her skin tight latex Nazi nurse outfit that made her breasts sound like two balloons rubbing together and after punching me in the stomach she took her latex covered fingers and forced my mouth open.

I'm telling you these fever dreams have been something horrible!