As you probably know, these are the letters J and L which work for me and Jessica. They are based on a design I created some time back. I think they came out great! Jessica did a great job assembling different artists around the world to do the different aspects needed to complete the rings. I was very excited to see them finished!

Jessica also found me a great suit! I'm very happy with it. I just wish I looked better in it. I hope I lose some more weight by May 27th!

The work on the wedding is getting done. Jessica and her family are getting stuff ready. Food, decorations, guest lists, invites... There's still so much I need to do. Music... I know there is so much more... I think I'm overwhelmed and can't remember. I have a list somewhere.

If I were to be completely honest with you, and I don't want to hurt anyone... This may not be the best place to talk about this, but... I think as much as I wanted to get married to Jessica all these years, something inside of me has recently began causing me trouble. I believe I have just started to lose interest in the wedding itself. I know that sounds awful. Maybe it will change. Maybe I can just look at it as a big party for her. I kind of want to let my family and friends know it's okay if they can't make that long drive. I know it's a long way to come just for me.

Maybe it's the medication I'm on, maybe it's something else, but I'm going through something here and I hope it works itself out. I want more than anything for Jessica to be happy, but maybe I'm not the man that can truly make her or anyone, or even myself happy.