I had 5 polyps removed and some other things I can't pronounce. No cancer is believed to be found, yet. I was given heavy drugs, but they had no effect on me. I was awake the whole time watching the journey on the monitor, asking questions, and watching the reaction of the nurses and doctor who couldn't believe I felt no pain or wasn't unconscious. So make no mistake; I AM A MAN!

I asked repeatedly for a copy of the video, but they said it was only LIVE and not recorded. It was the most awesome thing I've ever seen! My colon is, I swear to God, a beautiful work of art!

My friend, Jerome talking to me about my colonoscopy, said, "Keep me updated. Hope all they find is your asshole." To which I replied, "I'm sure they will, cause it's glowing red like ET's finger."

Going in the Hospital for a Colonoscopy this morning, the Billing Dept. started calling at 7am to see if I could pay the full amount in advance before the procedure! It's like a call from a collection agency for a future debt. She had that much personality, too. I hate our healthcare system/insurance companies! Every time I turn around it feels like I'm getting fucked in the ass... Hmm, that's what this will feel like, isn't it?

I think more people should be aware of this news, even if it's 4 years old and has had such little media interest. I can't think of a single friend that hasn't either had a loved one touched by cancer or had cancer themselves. I also know more people that believe money is being made off this disease and a cure is being hidden, than those that don't.

http://hubpages.com/hub/Scientists_cure_cancer__but_no_one_takes_notice

Now I know what this dream from the other day was all about! I was being given a CT Scan and the Doctor said, "The Rapture is within you!" That was a long night of horrible and disturbing dreams. However, the next day while out shopping I discovered a pint load of my blood had emptied out of my ass into my pants. That was very scary! I'm so glad I had a backpack full of other clothes. Now The Rapture is tomorrow! But I imagine Rapture and Rupture meant something in dream language. Funny how the mind works.

You now have NINE DAYS (9 Days) to get me something awesome for my B'day! It doesn't have to cost anything at all, it can be cheap, or it can be priceless. You know you want to give it to me!

When Jessica told me her IQ, I was strangely aroused, but as the days passed, I found myself obsessed with her genius and I began to feel inadequate. I may not be smart, but I know what love is! Her kids are also way brainy! They are like those blond aliens in "Village of the Damned" and when they try to peer into my puny human brain I think of a brick wall and behind that wall is this clock.

http://reflectionof.me/iq-alarm-clock

This is weird; For the 3rd time in two months I have received an email warning me that people are plagiarizing my writing. That is very nice of them to let me know, however not one of them gave me a link to the culprits. Has this happened to you?

My body has become a crazy straw! Liquid goes in, spirals around, then shoots right out! Biology is so icky sometimes!

Couple of friends were excited about this before they just saw it tonight. One said the other day, "Jerry, don't you want to see Penelope Cruz?" To which I said, "I would much rather watch Little Lupe in a hot theater with sticky floors than go see that film!" They both had to ask me who Little Lupe was. They think they're cinephiles. Pfft!

http://www.slantmagazine.com/house/2011/05/a-fountain-of-maggots-rob-marshall...